


Little Things

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, M/M, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-02
Updated: 2013-07-02
Packaged: 2017-12-16 20:15:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/866165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world is little, people are little, human life is little.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Things

You just give in sometimes, you know? To whatever, you just say to yourself,  _what the hell I won't be here forever,_ and you let it happen. And then that something, whatever you've let happen, becomes the center of your universe, the sun that everything revolves around. It becomes— _He_  becomes the sunshine in the mornings and moonlight after midnight and it makes it so much better when all the puzzle pieces start sliding together. His posture whenever he spoke to you, his honest laughter whenever you made a fool of yourself, his odd reaction when you rambled of your infatuation with Mikasa. After you've spent a while just paying attention to details, these things started to make sense.

Then you want to apologize, but all those apologies would be wasted words. They are so meaningless when you compare them to this, to what you have now. To him kissing you earnestly instead of clumsily and nervously like months ago; to you holding him by the waist like he's going to slip away; to him delicately unbuttoning your shirt and shrugging it off your shoulders, then tracing your arms with his fingertips gently. And you shudder because it's another small detail that makes you feel so much, makes you wonder if you could hug him tight enough for your two bodies to merge. You tickle his neck with your swollen, kissed lips and whispers of honest words against his skin make him moan and cling to you. They make him give himself to you. So you take all that he is and make love to him that night for the first time like it's the last, because living life like this, you never know.  _You never could have known._

Had you known the titans would go this berserk while Eren worked to get the wall patched up, you would have organized your unit better. Had you known Marco would rush in to rescue, the  _idiot_ , to distract the titans while you got your maneuver gear to work, you would have chased him down, bound him to the nearest building and made him stay put. Had you known you would find his half eaten body on the side of the road, you would have held him just a bit closer that night, and kissed him just a bit longer, made love to him again and again until you passed out in each other's arms. When the sun rose, you would have had his sleepy laughter wake you up. Most of all, you would have told him all the things that never occurred to you before the first time you kissed, before you paid attention to your apparent closeness that was just  _there_  this entire time. You would have told him about all these little things you were aware of now, just to tell him, even if they made no sense at all. You would have counted the freckles on his face were you given the time, except you weren't and now looking at his motionless body all you're left with is void and unspoken words that won't let you breathe.


End file.
